Tag: Maturing

Today’s Word Is PRESENCE

Tue-Jun-30-2020

I have a memory from age four of being leery of a tiger under my bed. Starting at the door of my bedroom, I would run and leap into bed. In coping with this, there were times that I wanted one of my parents to stay with me until I went to sleep. When I awoke, it was a relief that nothing “got me” during the night! As an adult all this seems so silly, but at the time it was real.

There are adult versions of this feeling in which strange emotions stir within us of feeling alone and helpless in a time of stress, fear, or loss. These feelings are not invited in. They just rise up from within us, and at first, we feel helpless and even empty. For instance, one of my sisters died in a car wreck when she was 17. I was 23 and away attending seminary. This shook me up. I felt helpless and empty. It was as if some part of me died with her.  Have you ever felt like that?

Seven years later, I again got shaken up emotionally by going through the pain of divorce. It rocked my world. For months I would feel queasy in my stomach just from the emotions of loss. At first it was daily, then occasionally, but still there. It lasted so long that I wondered if it would be permanent. I wanted desperately to know how to overcome it. Thanks be to God, there is a way, and this is my testimony.

Through these and other difficulties, my faith became to mean everything to me. I learned that it was only through faith and God’s grace that I could make it. This happened because thankfully I believed what I had heard and read that this is how you heal. God has helped me put my roots down into him, as I grew upward toward my dreams and destiny. I can’t identify the exact moment I became “thoroughly” secure in his love, but it would be sometime near age fifty … finally!

No longer do I have to wonder if there is something under the bed … LOL … which in adult language means I believe that nothing can overpower or overwhelm me, because there is no longer any doubt or lack of the inner experience of God’s presence. No more wondering if something could go wrong or separate me from his love.

Today’s verse says, “And when I wake up, you are still with me.” (Psalm 139:18) I hope you make this transition in life. We must move on from experiencing God’s presence in the moment, but all the time wondering if there might come a moment when we are alone. It is like being just unsure enough that we get surprised each time and say, “I was hoping God would always be with me, and thank goodness, again today, it still feels like he is. I sure hope I feel like this again tomorrow morning.”

There is a profound sense of deeper peace in which I know God is with me, and I know I will never be alone. It is a sense of warmth in the heart that never leaves. It is great to know God’s constant presence, to know that whether I am awake or asleep he is with me.

I don’t have to wait until tomorrow morning to know that “when I awake, God is still with me.” I already know it will be true for every single morning for the rest of my life, he will still be there. This is God’s gift to you and to me … not just his presence with us right now, but also the assurance of his future presence.

Blessings,

Chaplain Mark

Another verse:

“For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38-39)

Today’s Word Is BROKENNESS

Mon-Jun-29-2020

“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.” – King David (Psalm 51:17)

The first place to start is this … everybody needs fixing. I need fixing. You need fixing. The list of perfect people is not very long, there has only been one name on that list … ever.

The second thing is this … you can’t get fixed until you admit you are broken. This is a problem. Who wants to admit they need help? But we are like a broken watch in need of the watchmaker.

King David wrote some very wonderful poems. He was a wise man. He was a warrior and conqueror extraordinaire. But, he had a thirst for power and a lust for women. (You can read that story in 2nd Samuel Chapter 11.) His attraction to Bathsheba led to adultery, followed by a plan to get rid of her husband so that no one would find out.

The prophet Nathan cornered David into a discussion and confession. David was brash and gutsy, but he knew from history that if you are guilty, you don’t challenge God or one of his prophets. It will not end well.

So he hit his knees, and admitted his brokenness.

It is amazing and sad how many people will not do the simple thing of confessing their wrongdoing, admitting their brokenness, taking on a contrite attitude, and asking God to forgive and restore. By the way, when I say “they,” I really mean “me” first. People sometimes revere pastors and spiritual leaders, but we are not exempt.

I once saw a woman get a new start on life by forgiving her sister for something done 30 years before. (She was waiting for the apology that was never coming.) I have seen an adult daughter reconcile with her mother over something that happened as a teenager. I have seen two employees look at each other with a contrite heart, and both simultaneously say, “I’m sorry.”

Feeling broken may seem like a bad thing, but if it is acceptable and even desirable to God, then it really is a very good thing. Having worked as a hospital chaplain, I have seen many patients trying to be their own doctor, instead of listening to those who know how to heal. By the same token, I have also seen many people trying to be their own spiritual doctor instead of listening to God or the wise counsel of a spiritual leader.

It is human nature to take a different approach than humble confession. One way we do this is just to deny the problem. Another is to make excuses for why we think we were justified in our sin or failure. And yet another is to defiantly think we should just be let off the hook. Court cases end up like this sometimes … the accused pays a penalty without admitting wrongdoing. For David, this was not going to happen.

If we can’t admit our wrongdoing, we won’t get far in our faith journey. A song by Micah Stampley, called “Take My Life,” starts out … ”Holiness, Holiness is what I long for; Holiness is what I need.” A later verse adds, “Brokenness, Brokenness is what I long for. Brokenness is what I need.”

God mends broken people, but first comes admitting we are broken. A good posture for this is on our knees, hands out, eyes looking up to God. At this point, tears often come. And then begins the healing and restoration. Get used to this. It will come again and again as you get washed more and more. The 51st Psalm was written by David during the Bathsheba experience. Verse 2: Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. Verse 7: Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.

Clean on the inside, that’s what God wants to do.

Broken and Blessed!

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is ASSUMPTIONS

Fri-Jun-26-2020

The newly promoted department manager decides to float around the mass of cubicles surrounding his new office and let his new employees know that he is here and ready to take charge. Most everyone seems to be busy, except across the room he spots a guy leaning up against one of the cubicles. There is obvious casual conversation taking place, so Mr. New Manager decides he will let his new workers know what he expects in the way of productivity.

He strides up and says, “Young man, you need to get back to work instead of wasting your time.”

The fellow replies, “Whatever you say, man. Just getting in a little chit-chat time.”

Mr. Manager is appalled at the attitude. “Young man, how much money do you make a week?”

Undaunted the fellow looks at him and replies, “I make about $450 a week. Why?”

The manager reaches into his pocket, takes out $450 and says, “Here’s a week’s pay! Now GET OUT and don’t come back!”

Feeling rather good about his first firing, he looks around and sees several people with mouths and eyes wide open. “Does anyone want to tell me what that goof-off did here?” he asks. And someone toward the back of the room mutters, “He delivers pizza from Dominoes.”

Oops …

This verse might apply … “Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.” (Proverbs 16:18)

One thing pride does to us is to fool ourselves into thinking we know more than we do. We sometimes come up with false assumptions and then proceed to act on them. I have heard it said … “Engage your brain before opening your mouth!”

There are thirty-six Proverbs about the use of the mouth and the things we say, like this one: “The mouths of fools are their undoing, and their lips are a snare to their very lives.” (Proverbs 18:7)

I have said some pretty foolish things along my way in life, but I’m learning how to think before speaking. Something that helped me was to embrace God’s acceptance of me. Thus, when I don’t know something, I can say, “I don’t know.” There’s nothing wrong with that. And if I do say something presumptive or foolish, I can say, “Oops, I’m sorry. I got that wrong. My apologies. Help me get this straightened out.”

There’s always more to learn!

Blessings,

Chaplain Mark

NOTE: The BEMA Podcast is a great Bible Study tool from a Messianic Jewish perspective, which I highly recommend. It is a long-term study which will increase your understanding of the Scriptures in a new and deeper way. You can also get it on your other devices by going to the Google PlayStore or Apple App Store.

Today’s Word Is TRUTH

Thu-Jun-25-2020

This coming Sunday marks the 4th anniversary of the death of well-known Tennessee Women’s Basketball Coach Pat Summitt. Her premature death was due to early onset Alzheimer’s Disease. If you recall, I quoted her just recently in a devotion called “Today’s Word Is Team.”

Here is another great quote from Coach Pat Summitt:

“The absolute heart of loyalty is to value those people who tell you the truth, not just those people who tell you what you want to hear. In fact, you should value them most. Because they have paid you the compliment of leveling with you and assuming you can handle it.” – Pat Summitt

If you are going to value those friends who tell you the truth, you will need to value yourself first. And you can do that because God values you first and most.

If you do not accept and value yourself, you will not be able to …

  • Properly value those who are honest with you,
  • Handle the truth when it is painful,
  • Speak the truth to others without flinching,
  • Care about and value friends enough to speak the truth openly.

The Apostle Paul talks about “speaking the truth in love.” It takes maturity to do that. Some folks think that they should just “tell it like it is,” but end up leaving a trail of wounded people. While others think that their job is to soothe people, to the extent that they don’t “level” with anyone because it might “hurt” them.

Somewhere in the middle of that is “the way.” If someone who cares about you tells you a painful truth, then as Coach Summitt says, they have actually paid you a compliment … they believe in you, that you can hear what is difficult to hear and be able to “handle it.” And not just be able to handle it, but to be inspired by it, challenged to change, to grow, to improve, to succeed. And as Coach Summitt also says, if you can find someone who will treat you that way … both truthful and caring … you should value that person with your loyalty.

“… but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ …” – Apostle Paul (Ephesians 4:15)

As Paul points out, Jesus was the best at doing this … at speaking truth, and at loving others. It should cause us to want to “grow up” to be like Jesus, who is the head of our faith.

Carry this thought with you always … “Speak the truth in love.” You will know you are fulfilling this Scripture when you can do this without unnecessarily hurting others while you love them enough to speak to them the truth they need to hear.

Sometimes people get hurt by the truth. But hurt is not always a bad thing. It is through processing the hurts in life that we grow. They will make you “bitter” or “better” … your choice. But our reaction need not be to blame the person who had the courage to tell us the truth we needed to hear. Rather our response should be to turn to God in humility and ask how we may use this opportunity to grow forward into Him.

Good stuff!

Chaplain Mark

NOTE: The BEMA Podcast is a great Bible Study tool from a Messianic Jewish perspective, which I highly recommend. It is a long-term study which will increase your understanding of the Scriptures in a new and deeper way. You can also get it on your other devices by going to the Google PlayStore or Apple App Store.

Today’s Word Is FATHER

Fri-Jun-19-2020

A father and son story …

Many years ago, in the days of no indoor plumbing, a young farm boy and his friend from down the road got into a mischievous mood one day and decided to push over the outhouse.

The next day, the young boy’s father confronted him. “Son, do you know anything about the outhouse being turned over on its side? Tell me the truth now.”

The boy decided to call upon an incident in history in which George Washington made a confession to his father that he had cut down a cherry tree. So the young man said, “Dad, I cannot tell a lie. Yes, I pushed over the outhouse.”

His father said, “Come with me to the woodshed, and we will see about your punishment. You’re going to regret this, I’ll make sure of that!”

“But Dad,” said the son. “I thought I should tell you truth, you know, like George Washington admitting he cut down the cherry tree! And his father didn’t punish him, he was proud of him for telling the truth! So what’s the difference? Why do I get punished and he didn’t?”

“Well, son,” said the father. “Here’s the difference. George Washington’s father was not in the cherry tree at the time!”

Oops!

TODAY’S VERSE: The righteous who walks in his integrity– blessed are his children after him! [Proverbs 20:7]

This coming Sunday is Fathers’ Day. My father died 26 years ago. I can’t believe he’s been gone that long. He is the most genuine and kind man I have ever known. He was a pastor all his life.

It was 46 years ago that I became a father. My assistance for raising kids came from the Bible, the example of my own father, guidance from other wise people, and books by those with the gift of teaching. My failures were many, but I kept on trying.

FOR YOU FATHERS who are reading this … Happy Father’s Day! It is an honor and a privilege to be a father. Here are some things I have done regarding my father:

  • I have carried with me his approval. I knew he loved me.
  • I have forgiven him for his failures.
  • I have embraced his gifts and positive characteristics that ended up in me.
  • I have used some of his failures as inspiration for me to do better.
  • I retell the stories of good times and hard times, of great fun and lessons learned.

Perhaps you would like to make your own list of how you have processed the fathering you have received and in what way you can affirm your father. None of us can possibly get everything we need from an earthly father. The design is to move on as an adult from dependence on an earthly father to dependence on our Heavenly Father, who continues the fathering job for the rest of our lives.

My prayer today … Thank you, Lord, for being a perfect Father to me. Thank you for my father; he was one of the good ones. Thank you for my son and sons-in-law, and lead them to be strong fathers. Thank you, Lord, for making up the difference, for all of us, between what we “needed” and what we “got” from an earthly father. May we as a people honor our fathers this weekend, while remembering that none of us are perfect. Forgive us. We are grateful, Heavenly Father, that you are the best! AMEN.

Happy Father’s Day!

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is DUST

Tue-Jun-16-2020

Furniture likes to collect dust. In biblical days, so did feet. And according to Jesus, so can you, in a spiritual sort of way. These are leftover emotions from negative interactions with people.

Jesus once sent his disciples out on a mission – a mission with a good purpose – healing, restoring, blessing. He knew that some people would welcome them, and others would not. Thus, his instructions to them were, that if anyone welcomed them … enjoy it … and thank them!

But he also said, “If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet as you leave that house or town.” (Matthew 10:14)

In biblical days, a guest that was taken in for shelter or lodging, was to be treated with kindness and respect. First order of business … get their dusty feet cleaned off. If your host did this, you knew you were welcome. However, not everyone wants to hear what you have to say. They may obviously need help, and yet push you away with … “I don’t want your help! Go away!” If you are not welcome, Jesus advised that you leave the distastefulness of this rejection behind by symbolically shaking the dust off your feet.

Take note … this is different from what the world would have us do. Wiping off the dust means … not demonstrating anger, not mocking or rebuking, and not thinking up ways to get revenge. It means refraining from complaining … not using this as an opportunity to get some sympathy points. There is no need to post your hurt feelings on Facebook or Twitter, no sharing what these ungrateful people have done to offend you.

Jesus was telling his disciples that when you have been generous or noble or honest or caring or at least sincere, and someone still has an axe to grind, a complaint to register … well, you don’t have to be rude or angry back at them as you leave. Maturity is about gaining wisdom to carry with us, while leaving the “dusty” part behind.

If you are carrying “dust” around from an unpleasant rejection, shake it off and leave it behind … No anger … No disappointment … No revenge … No mumbling … Just wipe it off and go on, at peace. If you’re still angry or resentful, you took the dust with you when you left.

I think I need a paper towel,

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is SWIM

Mon-Jun-15-2020

The prophet Ezekiel lived in Jerusalem in 590 BC, as one of the Jews who had not been taken into captivity and carted off to Babylon. And he had a prophetic vision (Chapter 47) of a stream flowing out from the Temple, which was a message of hope for those being held in exile. The river in his vision flowed eastward for about 1,500 feet and was ankle-deep. As the Lord took him further, the water became knee-deep for another 1,500 feet, and then waist-deep for another 1,500 feet. (That’s a little over a mile so far. Then …

He [the Lord] measured off another fifteen hundred feet. By now it was a river over my head, water to swim in, water no one could possibly walk through. He said, “Son of man, have you had a good look?” (Ezekiel 47:5-6)

Have you ever been in “over your head”? That’s where the Lord was taking Ezekiel. This is the Christian life of faith. This is when we truly begin to trust in the Lord with all we have, in a state of total dependence.

Here are some things we learn from this. First, the Lord is gracious – He starts us out in ankle-deep water. If not, we might chicken out! And it keeps us going, because there is more. I do think, however, that some of us are still in that ankle-deep water. Some of us kept getting deeper and deeper into faith, until our feet didn’t touch. Some of us have succumbed to fear and stopped moving forward in order to stay where our feet can touch the bottom.

It is interesting that while we are in the shallower water, it is easier to see what’s under there! Sometimes, that’s why we don’t go deeper. Fears can arise when we are unsure of what might happen next or how we would handle difficult moments. However, we should know that God knows everything that is under there, and he will not let us sink — or be eaten alive — or suffer mortal wounds. Being unsure of ourselves might just be a sign that we are also unsure of God’s faithfulness. Trusting in God creates courage and confidence.

This vision teaches us that God wants us in those deep waters – he wants us to swim! After all, that is where we really learn to trust! And the waters of God are fresh water. They are healing waters. The Lord told Ezekiel, “Where the river flows everything will live.” (v. 9)

If you are nervous reading this because you are someone who fears swimming, remember that this passage is about your spirit swimming in and with the Holy Spirit. It is a life of adventure and trust. In a sense, we are out of control, because the current of a river is too strong for us to go wherever we want to. God wants us to go with the flow – not to swim upstream trying to get back to some false feeling of safety. Going with the flow means following the Spirit. We don’t necessarily go where other people are going, or even where they think we should go – we go where God goes!

Have you ever been whitewater canoeing? I did a lot of that in my younger years. There are three types of experience that stand out to me. First, there are “floats.” The river moves quietly and steadily along. You can paddle and make good time, or if you like you can rest and let God carry you. Then there are “pools.” These are places where the water is deeper and calmer. You can get out of the boat and not get carried away by a strong current. It is a time to stop and play! You can empty the boat of any water you took on. And while you have the boat flipped over, you can swim underneath as you laugh and play. You can also sit on the shore and relax.

But the other experience is when those “rapids” come. There are dangers, hard work, crashes, and disasters. You may get stuck or fall out. But to a canoeist, this is the best part of the trip. Who wants to go canoeing if there are no rapids!? The hard part is also the most fulfilling part of the adventure.

Regarding the river of your life … do you spend your time trying to avoid the rapids? Do you decline the difficult things? People need us, and it isn’t easy going. And furthermore, do you fail to stop and play when God provides the opportunity? Stop struggling in the river and relax. Be ready for the rapids when they come, don’t fight them, use them.

Are you ready to head for deeper water… meaning a deeper life? Are your feet still touching the bottom? Are you all in for Jesus enough that you will go where the Holy Spirit takes you and enjoy the great adventure that he has for you?

A final thought … the Israelites in captivity were surely wondering if God had abandoned them. They were no longer in their homeland. They were enslaved with little hope of being free. And the Temple that housed the presence of the Holy Spirit of God was far away. But Ezekiel’s vision was a clear message that God leaves the Temple to come to his people. Babylon was east of Jerusalem, and the waters in the vision flowed east out of the Temple. God was reaching out to his people, heading their direction, bringing his river of love to engulf them, support them, and carry them.

You are not alone or abandoned. You are not without help. God is with you and he wants you to swim in the waters of the Spirit that he brings to you. Trust him. Enjoy him. Enjoy the adventure. Go with God’s flow. Play in the pools. Battle the rapids. Together we will make it. The river of life is a great place to be.

Blessings,

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is IDEA

Fri-Jun-12-2020
It’s Humor Day!

Frank and Beulah don’t get out much at their age, but one day Frank gets this idea that he is going to ride horses with his best friend, Ralphie. Beulah thinks this is a bad idea. “Frank, you haven’t ridden horses in decades! You’re going to get yourself hurt, and then you’ll be out of commission for weeks!”

Nevertheless, the next day Ralphie comes by to pick him up and off they go to ride horses. After two or three minutes of riding, Frank falls off! “Oh my gosh!” Ralphie exclaims. “Are you OK?”

“Sure, I’m fine,” replies Frank. “Just a little shaken up. I’m a little rusty, you know.”

“Let’s quit and go home,” Ralphie suggests. “Maybe Beulah was right. This was a bad idea.”

“No way,” insists Frank. “You know we did this a lot when we were younger, and we always got back on to show the horse who’s boss. I can do it. I know I can.”

So, Frank gets back on and rides some more. But wouldn’t you know it, he promptly falls off again! Ralphie is concerned, of course. “Frank, that’s enough. You’re going to really hurt yourself, just like Beulah said. She will never let you hear the end of this!”

“Now Ralphie,” Frank starts. “I know this is a little unusual, but I used to be so experienced at this. I am going to try one more time. I just know I can do it.”

Back on the horse, Frank holds on tighter this time. It looks like he might last longer than before, but no, off he goes again. “That’s enough, Frank,” Ralphie says firmly. “We’re going home!”

“Aw, come on, Ralphie,” Frank pleads. “Have some confidence in me. Just one more try. P-l-e-a-s-e.”

So Ralphie explains, “Look, Frank. I know I agreed to this, but we’re done. Besides, if you want to try one more time, I’m going to have to go back into K-Mart and get some more quarters!”

Some things are just bad ideas. Did you ever have one?

In Exodus 32, the Israelites, having escaped Egypt through the Red Sea, were camped at the foot of Mount Sinai, waiting for Moses to return from an encounter with God on the mountain. While Moses was in the presence of God receiving the Ten Commandments, the people below were getting restless. Moses had taken so long that they were beginning to think he might not be coming back.

So, they appealed to Moses’ older brother Aaron to take control of the leadership. They knew they were supposed to have an encounter with God. They knew they were headed for the Promised Land. So, an idea emerged.

When the people saw that Moses delayed to come down from the mountain, the people gathered themselves together to Aaron and said to him, “Up, make us gods who shall go before us. As for this Moses, the man who brought us up out of the land of Egypt, we do not know what has become of him.” So Aaron said to them, “Take off the rings of gold that are in the ears of your wives, your sons, and your daughters, and bring them to me.”  So all the people took off the rings of gold that were in their ears and brought them to Aaron. And he received the gold from their hand and fashioned it with a graving tool and made a golden calf. And they said, “These are your gods, O Israel, who brought you up out of the land of Egypt!”  (Exodus 32:1-4)

Bad idea. Have you ever rushed into something because you couldn’t wait for God’s plan to play out? Theirs was a tragic mistake. And lo and behold … Moses showed up as they were dancing and celebrating the golden calf that was their new god.

And Moses said to Aaron, “What did this people do to you that you have brought such a great sin upon them?” And Aaron said, “Let not the anger of my lord burn hot. You know the people, that they are set on evil. For they said to me, ‘Make us gods who shall go before us. As for this Moses, the man who brought us up out of the land of Egypt, we do not know what has become of him.’ So I said to them, ‘Let any who have gold take it off.’ So they gave it to me, and I threw it into the fire, and out came this calf.” (Exodus 32:21-24)

If it weren’t so tragic, this could but one of the most humorous statements in the Bible! In verse 4, Aaron is “fashioning” a golden calf with a tool. But in verse 24, Aaron says, ”and I threw [the gold] into the fire, and out came this calf.” Really? That sounds like an eight-year-old trying to explain something to an adult who knows full well, that’s not what happened!

There is a phrase in this passage that describes what their impatience with God really was. Aaron said, “You know the people, that they are set on evil.” True. And obviously Aaron was not going to shoulder any of the blame. It was their fault! If you are a believer, you know that the truth will prevail. Bad ideas are just that … bad ideas. And there are consequences.

Don’t go for the bad idea. And don’t be afraid to tell someone else, “That’s a bad idea.” Be patient. God’s idea is best.

Have a blessed day,

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is BUILD

Thu-Jun-11-2020

“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” (1st Thessalonians 5:11)

Suppose you have an area of your life where you want to “get better” or “get well.” You have been inspired by some person or event, perhaps a book you have read, a sermon you heard, a difficult experience you faced. You believe God is calling you higher, toward spiritual and emotional health, toward greater faith, deeper peace, higher joy.

So, being inspired you put better things into practice in your life. You start going back to church … or you quit a bad habit … or you apologize and fix a broken relationship … etc.

Then you discover that your choice to “get better” has caused some other person to have difficulty adjusting to the “new you.” That’s because all of us are part of a system of relationships. The basic ones are family connections, and some families are healthy to various degrees while others are perhaps slightly or severely dysfunctional. The same is true for friendships, co-workers, church family, or neighbors.

To the point … There is a theory in family systems that when one person improves, another person sometimes gets worse! That person begins to act out in negative ways. The more dysfunctional the family system, the more likely this is to happen. And why would someone get worse in response to your getting better?? … Because they want things to go back to the way they used to be. They have lost some feeling of importance perhaps. Their reaction is a temper tantrum of sorts.

Suppose, for instance, that you decide to start going back to church. And someone in your family tells you that “we always have family dinner at grandma’s house every Sunday at noon, and now you have messed that up! You’re causing a problem for the rest of us. See how selfish you are!” Any number of decisions could affect others in ways they resent.

They may even react so negatively that they become angry or spiteful. This behavior makes you think they are getting ready to wreck their life … or wreck your life … or damage the whole family. You consider abandoning your plan to improve your life and going back to the way things were. You say to yourself, “This was a bad idea. I had no idea so-and-so would be against it. I don’t want to hurt their feelings or lose their friendship, etc., etc.”

But you should consider that if you give up, you are in effect giving that person control over your life, even your faith life. You may realize that this person actually has control over the whole family system. They use their switching between good and bad behavior to manipulate and control everyone else.

Everyone’s situation is different, of course, but in general this is a time in your life to stick to it. If this is God-inspired, then you can go ahead with the plan, but also step up your love and encouragement of this person. Trust God for strength and believe that you will make it, and that the upset person will finally adjust, perhaps even improve just like you did.

As believers it is our job to encourage people in these situations and to build them up. So if someone is being bullied back into regression or belittled for trying to improve, it is our privilege and a command from the Word to “go to bat” for that person. Speak up. Offer encouragement.

And if you’re the one who needs the encouragement, a good thing you can do for yourself is to make it easy for others to support you, by being open. Don’t give up on the “better” things God is calling forth in you. He will provide a way for your future. Turn the naysayers over to God. He can help them better than we can anyway.

Blessings,

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is BECOME

Wed-Jun-10-2020

Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm. (Proverbs 13:20)

It matters with whom we associate. We cannot avoid being around all kinds of people. Some will be likable and some not … cheerful or not … kind or not … problem solvers or not … complainers or not … and wise or not.

Contact and collaboration are necessary with all these people. But … we do not have to “walk with” everyone in the sense referred to by this Proverb. Everyone must choose their principles and beliefs, and in so doing you will discover whom you should walk in step with. And by observation, others should be able to figure out who you “walk with.” They are the ones with whom you share a common faith, the ones you admire and want to imitate. These are the ones who will back you up in a disagreement, because you know their heart and they know yours. Skin color, cultural background, education, social standing, and affluence have nothing to do with this.

If I could make a group photo of the people I have “walked with” in my life because I sought their wisdom … They are from cultures and colors all around the world … Some have been far older than me, some far younger … Some have lived in mansions, some have lived in a tent camp in the woods … Some count their money in the millions, while some have no bank account, just what is in their pocket … Some have doctorate degrees, some never went inside a school … Some are popular with others, some not … Some are widely known or famous, some count their friends on one hand. God will show you with whom you should walk in order to become wise.

As we relate to those whom we think of as wise, we are influenced by their character and behavior. We observe how they have a positive effect on the world around them. We ask them questions and learn their secrets of peace, motivation, boldness, and wisdom.

I hope you have a desire to become a wiser person. God loves us as we are … yes … but he loves us too much to leave us the way we are. It has been said that you can’t “go with God” and stay where you are. And an important aspect of becoming who God wants us to be is that of walking with wise people.

Do you know that there are lots of very smart people who are foolish? The fool has said in his heart, “There is no God.” (Psalm 14:1) Intelligence and foolishness can coexist within a person. There is a great difference between being smart and being wise. My admiration goes to those wise people whom God has placed in my life for the purpose of lifting me up and showing me the way.

Have you noticed that some folks are attracted to foolish people? They associate with them because it appears at times that they are carefree and unburdened. Whereas the wise person appears to be doing too much work, or getting redirected sometimes by inconvenient interruptions, or even being forced to make sacrifices that are not appealing. However, the wise person chooses these inconveniences for the greater good of others and for the high calling of character and integrity.

For you and me to become the best we are meant to be, it matters whom we admire and imitate. As for the one who is foolish, but appears on the outside to “have it made” … a window into their private moments might show us the “flip side” of their lifestyle, which includes hidden inner suffering, and whose behaviors create undesirable consequences. They get tied up in a pattern of repeatedly making botched attempts to reverse the results of their foolishness. These are the things they hide from us.

Spending time with foolish people can be a good thing. They may seek us out because they admire something about us. But again, there is a difference between spending time with someone and being their “companion.” Do you see that? If we are the salt of the earth and the light of the world (Matthew 5:13-14), then we must get close to and involved with people who need salt and light. Our companions, however, are those with whom we stand in lockstep in the faith, ready to change the world.

Have you ever suffered harm because you were the companion of fools? Hopefully, we have left that behind and moved on. If not, now would be a good time to resolve to walk with the wise, and in so doing become wise.

Blessings,

Chaplain Mark