Tag: Loving Others

Today’s Word Is TRUTH

Thu-Jun-25-2020

This coming Sunday marks the 4th anniversary of the death of well-known Tennessee Women’s Basketball Coach Pat Summitt. Her premature death was due to early onset Alzheimer’s Disease. If you recall, I quoted her just recently in a devotion called “Today’s Word Is Team.”

Here is another great quote from Coach Pat Summitt:

“The absolute heart of loyalty is to value those people who tell you the truth, not just those people who tell you what you want to hear. In fact, you should value them most. Because they have paid you the compliment of leveling with you and assuming you can handle it.” – Pat Summitt

If you are going to value those friends who tell you the truth, you will need to value yourself first. And you can do that because God values you first and most.

If you do not accept and value yourself, you will not be able to …

  • Properly value those who are honest with you,
  • Handle the truth when it is painful,
  • Speak the truth to others without flinching,
  • Care about and value friends enough to speak the truth openly.

The Apostle Paul talks about “speaking the truth in love.” It takes maturity to do that. Some folks think that they should just “tell it like it is,” but end up leaving a trail of wounded people. While others think that their job is to soothe people, to the extent that they don’t “level” with anyone because it might “hurt” them.

Somewhere in the middle of that is “the way.” If someone who cares about you tells you a painful truth, then as Coach Summitt says, they have actually paid you a compliment … they believe in you, that you can hear what is difficult to hear and be able to “handle it.” And not just be able to handle it, but to be inspired by it, challenged to change, to grow, to improve, to succeed. And as Coach Summitt also says, if you can find someone who will treat you that way … both truthful and caring … you should value that person with your loyalty.

“… but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ …” – Apostle Paul (Ephesians 4:15)

As Paul points out, Jesus was the best at doing this … at speaking truth, and at loving others. It should cause us to want to “grow up” to be like Jesus, who is the head of our faith.

Carry this thought with you always … “Speak the truth in love.” You will know you are fulfilling this Scripture when you can do this without unnecessarily hurting others while you love them enough to speak to them the truth they need to hear.

Sometimes people get hurt by the truth. But hurt is not always a bad thing. It is through processing the hurts in life that we grow. They will make you “bitter” or “better” … your choice. But our reaction need not be to blame the person who had the courage to tell us the truth we needed to hear. Rather our response should be to turn to God in humility and ask how we may use this opportunity to grow forward into Him.

Good stuff!

Chaplain Mark

NOTE: The BEMA Podcast is a great Bible Study tool from a Messianic Jewish perspective, which I highly recommend. It is a long-term study which will increase your understanding of the Scriptures in a new and deeper way. You can also get it on your other devices by going to the Google PlayStore or Apple App Store.

Today’s Word Is BUILD

Thu-Jun-11-2020

“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” (1st Thessalonians 5:11)

Suppose you have an area of your life where you want to “get better” or “get well.” You have been inspired by some person or event, perhaps a book you have read, a sermon you heard, a difficult experience you faced. You believe God is calling you higher, toward spiritual and emotional health, toward greater faith, deeper peace, higher joy.

So, being inspired you put better things into practice in your life. You start going back to church … or you quit a bad habit … or you apologize and fix a broken relationship … etc.

Then you discover that your choice to “get better” has caused some other person to have difficulty adjusting to the “new you.” That’s because all of us are part of a system of relationships. The basic ones are family connections, and some families are healthy to various degrees while others are perhaps slightly or severely dysfunctional. The same is true for friendships, co-workers, church family, or neighbors.

To the point … There is a theory in family systems that when one person improves, another person sometimes gets worse! That person begins to act out in negative ways. The more dysfunctional the family system, the more likely this is to happen. And why would someone get worse in response to your getting better?? … Because they want things to go back to the way they used to be. They have lost some feeling of importance perhaps. Their reaction is a temper tantrum of sorts.

Suppose, for instance, that you decide to start going back to church. And someone in your family tells you that “we always have family dinner at grandma’s house every Sunday at noon, and now you have messed that up! You’re causing a problem for the rest of us. See how selfish you are!” Any number of decisions could affect others in ways they resent.

They may even react so negatively that they become angry or spiteful. This behavior makes you think they are getting ready to wreck their life … or wreck your life … or damage the whole family. You consider abandoning your plan to improve your life and going back to the way things were. You say to yourself, “This was a bad idea. I had no idea so-and-so would be against it. I don’t want to hurt their feelings or lose their friendship, etc., etc.”

But you should consider that if you give up, you are in effect giving that person control over your life, even your faith life. You may realize that this person actually has control over the whole family system. They use their switching between good and bad behavior to manipulate and control everyone else.

Everyone’s situation is different, of course, but in general this is a time in your life to stick to it. If this is God-inspired, then you can go ahead with the plan, but also step up your love and encouragement of this person. Trust God for strength and believe that you will make it, and that the upset person will finally adjust, perhaps even improve just like you did.

As believers it is our job to encourage people in these situations and to build them up. So if someone is being bullied back into regression or belittled for trying to improve, it is our privilege and a command from the Word to “go to bat” for that person. Speak up. Offer encouragement.

And if you’re the one who needs the encouragement, a good thing you can do for yourself is to make it easy for others to support you, by being open. Don’t give up on the “better” things God is calling forth in you. He will provide a way for your future. Turn the naysayers over to God. He can help them better than we can anyway.

Blessings,

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is MOTIVATION

Mon-May-11-2020

Compassion for others can be a great motivator, and that might be why you are working in a certain profession, or why you are involved in your church’s efforts to help others, or why you are driven to be on the lookout for someone to assist. The drawback to being motivated by the compassion in your heart for those in need is this … it can end up in “burn-out.”

Without sufficient “thank you’s” – without enough successes –  and because of untimely or distressing failures – we can sometimes find ourselves ready to quit. And our moments of discouragement like that can begin to occur more frequently. We might begin say to ourselves, “I’ve had enough,” or “This isn’t working.” We could just be gradually wearing down and wondering when we will cross over the line into saying, “I can’t do this anymore.”

Compassion, while necessary, cannot permanently stand alone as a motivator. Compassion both “empties our tank” and “fills our tank.” The time and energy we expend, which drains us, can be somewhat counterbalanced by the joy and satisfaction of seeing people get well, and of finding fulfillment through our work. But sooner or later, the drainage factors win, or the frustration of dealing with difficult people becomes too much, or we run into barriers or opposition to the good things we are trying to do. When this happens, and our tank gets low, we may be tempted to just hang it up  – unless there is another source of inspiration and energy that doesn’t depend on how successful we are at maintaining a positive attitude.

Here is a truth … The only long-term, sure-fire way of operating with sufficient and even excessive mental, emotional, and physical energy is to have a source other than just feeling good about helping the people we serve, or feeling fulfilled in our calling, or gaining respect and success.

From my perspective, the combination of the love of God, the work of Christ on the cross, and the comfort and power of the Holy Spirit is the only sufficient source in all the world to sustain us when our motivation is at a dangerous low. This love, affirmation, and encouragement from God is the emotional fuel that we require. When our motivation for our work is rooted in Him, we have an unfailing source that works equally well whether we are in a season of successes or in a moment of failure.

This is what the Apostle Paul meant when he said, “And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” (Colossians 3:17) We may be doing works of compassion, and we may care deeply about those whom we serve, but the motivation for doing them cannot simply be our desire to help.

So, I describe the deeper truth this way – “Yes, I am doing this because I care about you.” But underneath is a deeper motivation, that “I am doing this for Jesus and in His Name.” My ability to care about people has limits. My compassion can be tested sometimes and may begin to slide. But the compassion of Jesus has no limits. In the words of the Steven Curtis Chapman song, “His strength is perfect when our strength is gone. He’ll carry us when we can’t carry on. Raised in His power, the weak become strong. His strength is perfect, His strength is perfect.” (Based on 2nd Corinthians 12:7-10)

If you are relying on yourself, your successes, or even encouragement from friends to keep you motivated, eventually there will come a time when it won’t be enough. God doesn’t just want us to “survive,” he wants us to “thrive.” God alone can supply unlimited motivation. The other support we receive will be icing on the cake.

Have a blessed day,

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is DESERTS

Tue-May-5-2020

“Sing to God, sing praises to His name; Lift up a song for Him who rides through the deserts, Whose name is the LORD, and exult before Him. A father of the fatherless and a judge for the widows, Is God in His holy habitation.” (Psalm 68:4-5)

There is a saying that “God helps those who help themselves.” Of course, he does. He also helps those who don’t help themselves, those who can’t help themselves, those who do right, those who make mistakes, those who sin, and even those who think they don’t sin. The only reason I can think of that God wouldn’t help someone would be their defiant resistance – “Leave me alone, God!” – And even then, he would wait patiently for the opportunity.

One of God’s primary desires is to help those who cry out in need. We tend to get caught up in determining who does and doesn’t deserve help. But not so with God – he knows the whole story – we don’t. Do you remember the movie “Bruce Almighty”? When God gave Bruce the chance to “take the helm” and decide who to help, when to help, how to help – it was a disaster. No human can do that. I think Bruce discovered that God loves people, and that he helps because of this great love.

Yet, there are certain self-righteous folks who get so tired of people who keep messing up, that rather than help, they prefer to deliver a lecture. The phrase “God helps those who help themselves” is their way of saying, “I’ve had enough of you.” But it is not biblical to ascribe our impatience to God.

King David disobeyed God many times, doing foolish and selfish things. If you or I were the one he called on for help, he would probably get on our “last nerve.” But God doesn’t have a last nerve – his goodness, patience, love, and forgiveness are without limit.

The great love of God is revealed by the fact that he is a pursuing God. He is not just sitting there watching. He is on the move. He “rides through the deserts.” If you are stuck in a desert kind of place in life, God is in the desert with you. He wants you to trust him, hang onto him, receive rest from him. He wants you to know that he is good. Together with him, you will make it through the desert.

If your present situation makes you want to cry out for help, then be reminded that God is there – and he hears. The book of Deuteronomy repeatedly talks about helping “the strangers, the orphans, and the widows.” This is one of God’s great passions – those who cry out – those who have no help – those who get ignored or are told they are not worth helping.

The fatherless are those who feel like they do not belong to anyone, not only because they had no father growing up, but also because they have just failed to connect, to bond with someone, and they feel like an orphan. If that is you, then God will be your father, and validate your right to be who you are.

And the widows, in biblical days, were at a huge disadvantage. If there were no children to take up the slack, or extended family to “adopt” her, then she lived a meager life. There were laws that compelled the family of widows to take care of her. But it often took a judge to help her out, to make the family step up to the plate or to find someone who would provide for her. Still today, they are vulnerable in our world.

Let us “Sing to God, sing praises to His name.” Let us “exult before Him,” that he would “ride through deserts” for us.

And in his Name, may we help the strangers, the orphans, the widows, and all those who call upon God in their time of distress.

Blessings,

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is HELPFUL

Fri-Apr-17-2020
It’s Humor Day

A guy named Darnell is at the Pearly Gates, next in line for a chat with St. Peter, and finally steps forward. St. Peter starts thumbing through the Book of Life to find his name. Darnell is worried that it is taking so long. Finally, St. Peter says, “Well, here you are! I found it! I see you are a faithful believer.”

“Yes sir, that’s right, born again, trusting in Jesus,” says Darnell. “And I am thankful to be here.”

St. Peter says, “I see lots of interesting stories in here about kind things you have done. You seem to have a great reputation for being helpful when people are in need. Tell me, what’s your most memorable story of helping someone in need?”

Darnell commences, “Well, probably the scariest moment of trying to help someone was the time when I came around a corner after dark in the city and there was a gang in the alley beating up an elderly gentleman. I just had to help him out. I grabbed an iron pipe on the ground, ran down the alley right into the middle of them. I walked straight up to the leader of the gang, a huge guy with a studded leather jacket and a chain running from his nose to his ear. At that point, the gang members formed a circle around me. So, I ripped the leader’s chain off his face and smashed him over the head with the pipe. Then I turned around and yelled to the rest of them, ‘Leave this poor innocent man alone, you slime! You’re all a bunch of sick, deranged animals! Go home before I teach you all a lesson in pain!’”

St. Peter says, “Really? That sounds like a frightful situation. However, I do not see this story in the Book. When did this happen?”

 And Darnell says, “About five minutes ago.”

I hope you have a reputation for being helpful. In Chattanooga, we are not only dealing with the COVID-19 pandemic, but in the last few days we have the added tragedy of a series of tornadoes. Emergency Management says that over 1,000 structures were damaged, with 344 of those being completely destroyed. This amounts to approximately $300 million in damage, with 450 persons displaced from their homes and 2 known deaths in Hamilton County.

I am thankful for Nathan and Jason, who both have a reputation for being helpful and who responded with generator power. There are hundreds more like them out there helping one another recover from this destructive event.

It particularly pleases me to see the Christian community responding to these needs. Interestingly, the Thursday Bible Gateway verse of the day is … “Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law.” (Romans 13:8)

Because we love one another, we help when there is a need.

Enjoy your weekend, including family, rest, and worship,

Yes, you can worship at home!

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is HOSPITALITY

Wed-Apr-15-2020

“The things you do for yourself are gone when you are gone, but the things you do for others remain as your legacy.” – N. D. Kalu (former NFL defensive lineman)

Several years ago, we bought a new home that suited our desires better. One thing we wanted to do was to entertain guests more often. Previously we had an open space on the main floor where a few people could hang out. Then there was a finished basement downstairs with another den. Now we have a one-level space with a larger gathering area.

The sale of the old and purchase of the new has a God-story in it. We understand that this is not “our” house … it belongs to God, as do all our possessions, along with ourselves. Thus, we are now able to  use our home for larger family gatherings and for entertaining more friends. A playroom next to the great room was part of the design to bless our grandkids, as well as the children of our visitors.

All of this is because we believe that the principle of hospitality is central to our Christian faith. We have hosted several people who have stayed with us a night or two or more in our new home. One had an apartment emergency and needed a place to stay temporarily. Another came as a guest after being incarcerated, and upon release needed temporary housing.

And we didn’t just start this recently. In many of our homes we have housed our parents, family members, and others for extended stays. But, of course, you should do hospitality your way. It doesn’t have to be large groups or extended stays. Maybe it is another couple for dinner, or a few friends occasionally, or even a weekly Bible study. All of this “social distancing” because of the Corona Virus has made us miss having guests. My wife and I can’t wait to get back to hosting friends and family.

If you are like us, then at some point along the way you will have to face your adversity to being inconvenienced, and finally submit to God’s little tests to see if you are willing to drop your selfishness, pride, and affinity to comfort in exchange for the chance to make a difference in someone else’s life. You will eventually forget most of your dislike for being inconvenienced and think more about the joy of serving others.

This is what it takes to have an attitude of hospitality. And leaving a legacy of hospitality will inspire others to do the same.

“Be sure to welcome strangers into your home. By doing this, some people have welcomed angels as guests, without even knowing it.” (Hebrews 13:2 CEV)

Blessings,

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is FRAGILE

Mon-Mar-16-2020

How do you handle people who seem to be fragile? It is tempting to tell people who can’t deal with their problems to just “get over it.” There might be a handful of people for whom that works, but that approach is rarely effective. So, let’s consider two types of fragile people.

First – there are some folks who are always fragile; it’s a way of life, and a method of avoiding further hurt. It takes great commitment to help this kind of person without “enabling” their negative behavior. Usually this kind of person needs more help than we can give, and perhaps we should seek outside wisdom.

What they “say” they need is “a little help.” What they “actually” need is “inner healing” in a profound way. This idea sounds extremely frightening to them. They may get angry or hurt if you won’t give them, once again, a small dose of help. Their best hope is with a person who loves and is committed to them enough to find them some serious help. Counseling would be good. In a spiritual sense, they may need inner healing from a ministry that is equipped for it. Celebrate Recovery helps with addictions. Sozo ministries, Formational Counseling, and other ministries like them can help facilitate amazing emotional healing from God. I was involved many years with The Order of St. Luke the Physician and saw many people receive life-changing inner healing.

If this sounds like you or someone you know, and you are unsure how to proceed, please contact me.

Next … there are also folks who are temporarily fragile, such as during a hospital stay, or following the death of a loved one, or any number of other crises. It might also describe someone who has dealt with a difficult situation for a long time and is getting extremely weary and discouraged or close to falling apart. Sometimes this extends to the whole family, as all may be suffering and fragile. But these would be folks who normally seem to “have it together,” and who could get back on their feet through the love of Jesus and the assistance of their family and God’s family. For people such as this, we can apply the words of Isaiah the prophet, who said this about the coming Messiah Jesus … “A bruised reed He will not break, and a dimly burning wick He will not extinguish…” (Isaiah 42:3)

Being honest with people about their situation is necessary of course, but we can also be mindful that there is sometimes very little capacity remaining for dealing with their condition. In this sense, we are dealing with people who are like “bruised reeds” or “dimly burning wicks.” It is quite an art to help people deal with stress and hurt and to assist them with healing, while simultaneously caring for their personhood in such a way that we do not break their spirit or extinguish their hope. It is worth developing the ability to accomplish this.

Remember, we will occasionally run into one of those “always fragile” people who resist help. But many others will respond positively to our ability to get them through this present difficulty, even in their fragile state. And perhaps they will gain strength, wisdom, and maturity because of it, even to the point of gaining a passion to help others like you have helped them.

If you are one of those dimly burning wicks or bruised reeds, tell someone that you trust. Tell them that you are willing to listen, and that you need someone to walk with you. Find a friend, a chaplain, a pastor, a counselor, someone wise and trustworthy. If you have been thinking about this … then don’t put that off any longer. There is hope. Life can be better.

And if you know of a friend, co-worker, or family member who is “fragile” but won’t say so – then however gently you must do it, offer them some hope and support.

Blessings,

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is GRUMBLE

Mon-Mar-9-2020

“Do all things without grumbling or disputing …” – The Apostle Paul (Philippians 2:14)

I’ve done my share of grumbling, however it’s not very effective in the long run for me. I may end up getting what I “say” I want, but I may also lose some things that I wanted more – like friendship, harmony, and favor.

A very long time ago my wife and I were headed to the car after the church service, being one of the last handful to leave. A long-time church member was standing in the parking lot gazing at the back building, a wooden structure which housed the fellowship hall. He stopped us long enough to point at that there were three dead ex-Christmas trees discarded at the side of the building. (It was now February.) “This,” he said, “is a fire hazard!”

A couple in our Sunday School class was also walking to their car near us and overheard the comment. They paused and the husband looked at me. It was like our minds simultaneously knew what we were going to do. We didn’t miss a beat, as we strode over to the back building, grabbed the 3 trees, and dragged them about 50 yards away to a patch of woods, where we allowed them to join their other dead tree friends that were lying there crumbling away.

We turned back toward the parking lot, not looking at the grumbler, and joined our wives who had watched the scene unfold. We headed to our cars, waved and drove away. The grumbler was still standing there as if this didn’t turn out quite the way he had hoped – which would have been getting some mileage out of a perfectly reasonable grumble.

Was he right to point out the hazard? Yes. The problem he carried with him every Sunday at church was that he had the reputation of being a grumbler. Being friends with a grumbler is difficult, unless you are another grumbler, in which case you seem to feed off of each other. Such a reputation can be fixed – by repentance, seeking God’s help, making a sincere effort to change, and asking others to forgive you. It is my hunch that many Christians don’t start out being grumblers, it just develops over time in certain people. Thus, we should be on our guard.

“And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body.” – The Apostle Paul (Colossians 3:14-15a)

The Apostle Paul knew that the grumblers in the church worked against unity. They drive away hungry and sincere people who come to visit looking for a home church, but attract other legalistic people like themselves. The love of Christ softens our hearts and keeps us and our church at peace.

Have a blessed and grumble-free day,

Chaplain Mark

Today’s Word Is MERCIFUL

The Steps of Christian Maturity
Beatitude #5
Giving and Receiving Mercy
Mon-Feb-24-2020

“Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.” – Jesus (Matthew 5:7) (Beatitude #5)

Beginning at birth we all sing a song that goes like this … “It’s all about me, it’s all about me, it’s all about me, it’s all about me.” (You can make up your own tune.) You can also add a second verse, but of course it has the same lyrics as the first verse. From day one the demands are: feed me, change my diaper (especially when it contains a surprise), make me comfortable, hold me, rock me, pacify me. Repeat.

A narcissist is someone who never gets past the self-centeredness they were born with. Some narcissism is so extreme that such a person is like a sponge, soaking the life out of others and into themselves. In practical terms, this person is expensive to be around. Their demand for attention tends to increase over time. All the while you may begin suspecting that their interest in you may actually be based on selfish motives more than genuine appreciation and concern for you as a person.

What is missing in such a person’s life is the motivation and inspiration to jump the hurdle from self-centeredness to merciful. In the life of Christian faith and maturity which Jesus is describing in the Beatitudes, we have reached the point where that leap takes place. Jesus has spoken four blessings (Beatitudes) prior to this one … blessed are the poor in spirit (humble); blessed are those who mourn (letting go of what holds us back); blessed are the meek (genuine, at peace); and blessed are those who are hungry for right things and for things to go right.

In a way, this is the description of conversion to belief in Jesus … humility, confession, repentance, turning around, leaving the old life behind, and following him. For instance …  Jesus said to him [the rich young ruler], “If you wish to be complete, go and sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.” (Matthew 19:21) … and also … [Jesus said to them], “If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me.” (Mark 8:34)

These first four steps are about us as individuals becoming converted to and established in the faith. But now, in Beatitude #5, Jesus starts to describe the effect your new life has on your character and your desire to make a difference in the world around you The Holy Spirit moves in your heart because you feel blessed and as a result you become continually thankful. Then something springs forth from within you that wants to share this better life and to be a blessing to others. In other words, having been shown mercy by God, you become a merciful person toward others … like the song entitled “Pass It On” or the movie entitled “Pay It Forward.”

Now here’s the kicker … the favor you show to others gets returned to you. And these blessings come both from God and from others around you.

And here’s the paradox … we don’t receive this mercy by seeking it. If your motive for ministering to the needs of others is to cause them to be nice to you, it generally backfires. That’s because you are demonstrating not that you are a merciful person, but that you are a selfish person, more interested in your own needs than others.

The merciful person expects nothing in return, and yet receives in abundance.

Be merciful!

Chaplain Mark

NOTE: If you have not read the previous articles about each Beatitude, you should scroll further down and read previous days’ entries and catch up. We are discussing the faith journey toward Christian maturity as described by Jesus in the Sermon on the Mount.

The Beatitudes … Matthew 5:2-10 (NRSV)

2 Then he began to speak, and taught them, saying:

3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

4 “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

5 “Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.

6 “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.

7 “Blessed are the merciful, for they will receive mercy.

8 “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.

9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.

10 “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”

Today’s Word Is MINISTRY

Thu-Feb-13-2020

“Your greatest ministry will most likely come out of your greatest hurt.” – Rick Warren

This principle is not just for pastors, but for every believer. The word minister is from the Latin, meaning “servant.” All of us who call ourselves Christians have a ministry. Jesus referred to many types of ministry when he told his parable about “the least of these” …

Then they also will answer, saying, “Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?” Then he will answer them, saying, “Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.” (Matthew 25:44-45)

Your own difficulties, problems and hurts of the past often lead to a compassion for others who are experiencing similar hardships. Take a look back and consider how you endured by depending on God through various hard times, and made it through somehow, as a changed, wiser, and better person. This can become your inspiration to minister to and encourage others.

People who are struggling through a hardship or tragedy need to hear several things. First, they may be thinking that they are alone … as if they are the only one who ever had to go through something like this. By sharing your story, you can help them discover that they are not alone and that there is someone who understands. The fact that you have faced a similar situation, or even a heavy problem of any sort, regardless of how you dealt with it, can be a comfort to them.

Also, people need to know that there is “life on the other side.” After the storm has subsided and life settles back down, “can I still go on?” It is easy for folks to think that “life as I know it” is over with! I have had that thought during several tragedies and hardships in my life. But I am here to testify that it wasn’t the end of my dreams after all. Regardless of what I lost, there were new dreams, bigger adventures, and continued blessings which came along.

And finally, people want to know if they will be accepted after life has changed. Will I still have friends? Will I still believe that good things are coming? Will I still be acceptable in God’s sight? Yes, yes, yes, and yes. After a divorce at age 30, I thought my pastoral career was over. I thought I was now “defective” and unusable. But God had other ideas. I was amazed at the support I received to help me through. And I have grown immeasurably through both the acceptance of God, as he repaired my inner hurt, and the ministry of others repeatedly over the years.

Yes, you are a minister. And yes, you have a ministry. Who you are, what you have suffered and endured, and the growth and healing you have received all fit together to equip you for service to someone at their moment of need.

Blessings,

Chaplain Mark